posted NoLuckNeeded member cambaby2 in the joke contest
I thought this deserved it's own thread. If you like this post, please "Digg" it!
Translator from Women
40-ish = 48
Adventurer = Has had more partners than you ever will
Athletic = Flat-chested
Average looking = Ugly
Beautiful = Pathological liar and delusional
Contagious Smile = Bring your penicillin
Educated = College dropout
Emotionally Secure = Medicated
Feminist = Fat + ball buster
Free spirit = Substance user
Friendship first = Trying to live down slutty reputation
Fun = Annoying
Gentle = Comatose
Good Listener. = Borderline Autistic
New-Age = All body hair, all the time
Old-fashioned = Lights out, missionary position only
Open-minded = Desperate for husband
Outgoing = Loud
Passionate = Loud and annoying
Poet = Depressive Schzophrenic
Professional = Real Witch
Redhead = Shops in the Clairol section
Reubenesque = Grossly Fat
Romantic = Looks far better by candle light
Voluptuous = Fat
Weight proportional to height = Hugely Fat
Wants Soulmate = Two steps away from stalking
Widow = Nagged first husband to death
Young at heart = Toothless
Translator from Men
40-ish = 52 and looking for 25-yr-old
Athletic = Sits on the couch and watches ESPN
Average looking = Unusual hair growth on ears, nose, & back
Educated = Will treat you like an idiot
Free Spirit = Slept with your sister
Friendship first = As long as friendship involves nudity
Fun = Good with a remote, has streaked before
Good looking = Arrogant
Honest = Liar
Huggable = Fat, excessive body hair
Likes to cuddle = Insecure, overly dependent
Mature = Until you get to know him
Open-minded = Wants to sleep with your sister but she turned him down
Physically fit = spends a lot of time in front of the mirror
Poet = Has written on a bathroom stall and a dinner napkin
Spiritual = Once went to church on Easter Sunday
Stable = Occasional stalker, never arrested
Thoughtful = Always says "Please" when demanding a beer
Please digg this if you laughed: http://digg.com/comedy/Online_Dating_Translator_Personal_Ad_Abreviations_Jokes
"Now that's funny, I don't care who you are" Blue Collar Comedy Show
